NP: Brain Damage - Pink Floyd
I really must stop this. My emotional stability has been completely compromised. I can't keep a given disposition for more than 48 hours, and my oscillations are extreme. During psychology this afternoon, everything was dark in my eyes and I wanted nothing more than to lock myself in a metal box and fall into the ocean. Not four hours later, my entire outlook had changed. The world was a great place and I wasn't afraid to watch the moon. Now I seem to be coming down from that high. I haven't fallen into despair yet, but I probably will before tomorrow night.
I need to get a grip on myself. These violent mood changes are extremely fatiguing. Complete despair hasn't claimed me yet, but its appeal is ever-present: an end to this perpetual roller coaster. I still have the strength to fight it off, though, so no worries about institutionalization yet. I'm just tired of chaos being the only constant.
I really must stop this. My emotional stability has been completely compromised. I can't keep a given disposition for more than 48 hours, and my oscillations are extreme. During psychology this afternoon, everything was dark in my eyes and I wanted nothing more than to lock myself in a metal box and fall into the ocean. Not four hours later, my entire outlook had changed. The world was a great place and I wasn't afraid to watch the moon. Now I seem to be coming down from that high. I haven't fallen into despair yet, but I probably will before tomorrow night.
I need to get a grip on myself. These violent mood changes are extremely fatiguing. Complete despair hasn't claimed me yet, but its appeal is ever-present: an end to this perpetual roller coaster. I still have the strength to fight it off, though, so no worries about institutionalization yet. I'm just tired of chaos being the only constant.
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