Carpet Scraps

Your geometric patterns
Don't fall in with swelling lights.
The rhythms are identical.
Look closer.

Voices in the static
Following my conversation.
Evidence is circumstantial.
Look away.

I would ask you to stay,
Stay with me another day,
But the sun is going out.
The light is burning up.

Falling from the floor
To taste the gilded rafters.
Dancing through the accidentals.
Take a breath.

Human-colored raindrops
Roll across my budding tongue.
Expansion is temperamental.
Let it out.

I would ask you to stay,
Stay with me another day,
But the sun is going out.
The light is burning up.

Mourning is in doubt.

Drawing such inspired air
Into your closely-tethered lungs.
Friendship so coincidental.
Open your eyes.

Underwater - Audiovent

There isn't much to say upon one's return from Hell, except that it's wonderful to see the stars once again. Dante made the trip in one night, but not all of us have Virgil as a guide.

As it turned out, the solitude of Limbo wasn't why I was summoned. I had to descend into the deepest pit, walking the surface of Cocytus in the shadow of Lucifer, to find what I sought. I came to the place prepared for me, and I understood why I had been called so deep. This is what I saw:




Standing alone in the shadows beyond this altar, a small boy watched me with frightened eyes. His legs were locked in the icy prison, his ankles grasped by a familiar pair of hands. Tears were frozen on his face, but he was too small, weak, and afraid to brush them away. I reached toward him, but he pulled away as far as his frozen legs would allow. Understanding burrowed into the core of my being, and I knelt in front of him and placed my hands on the ice. The pain was excruciating, but I knew it was the only way I could escape this place. The ice slowly gave way, subliming into a thick fog. Hours or days, I couldn't tell how much time passed, but I finally felt a small pair of hands gingerly place themselves on my shoulders. Looking up, I witnessed something of which this God-forsaken pit had no memory: a small smile.

"I never forgot," he whispered.

"I know. Come, return to me," I replied.

The boy nodded, then began to dissolve into the fog created by the melted ice. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply of his essence, imbibing all he was into my spirit. When my eyes opened again, I was standing on the shore of Acheron, Charon's impatient face staring at me from his cursed vessel. When my eyes met his, he shrank back in fear and wonder.

"You! I thought you the same soul I bore seven days past, but 'tis not so!"

"You speak true, servant of the damned. You shall find my weight more burdensome this time, for I am no longer the halved spirit I was. I stand before you weak, bloodied, and alone, but I am whole once more."

Sheol - Jeff Johnson

Kiss my hands.

After nearly two years of college existence, I can honestly say it has been the worst time of my life. The events of recent months have infected ancient wounds and opened new sores. Final truth regarding Melissa has been obtained, but the knowledge brings no comfort. The Fates have taken me far beyond the thirteenth step, and whatever foundation I rested upon has been completely eroded. I can no longer hold back this tide.

The time has come for me to once again retreat beyond the River Acheron. My passage has already been arranged, and Charon will arrive for me shortly. As C.S. Lewis once said, the only place one can be completely safe from the dangers of love outside of Heaven is Hell. Heaven lends me no ear, so I must fall back on what certainty I have left.

During the length of my stay on Acheron's far shore, all portals of communication with the world of the living shall be closed. I will only maintain contact at points vital for the continuation of my worthless life.

I'm sure most of you reading this are thinking I'm just an emo kid overreacting to life and indulging his flair for the dramatic. If such is the case, you may now rest easy knowing that you no longer have to pretend at friendship with such an individual. I'm removing my irritating presence and worthless abilities from your life.

I bid the rest of you a very fond farewell. Should you still desire my friendship if and when I return, please send word.

Porcelain - Moby

Connect five semi-elongated diamonds to make a star.

Shade each diamond halfway along the longitudinal axis and you get the indie rock star.

Look for the indie rock star attached to cars, jackets, and backpacks to find posers.

Namedrop various mainstream and indie band names to evoke various reactions from posers.

.......

I have absolutely no motivation to register for classes next semester. In order to register, I need to talk to my advisor. Since transferring to Music Education, I don't even know who my advisor is. Besides, I'm quickly losing all motivation to continue any sort of formalized education, or education at all for that matter. The acquisition of facts and methods, theories and rules help nothing in the end. Nothing helps anything in the end.

(Enter NIHILISM hovering above PETER)

In the past, I received this e-mail newsletter from a professional asshole who believed he can explain how women's minds work. How a guy has to be C & F (Cocky and Funny) to win women, that Nice Guy = Wuss, therefore unattractive. This I can attest to, as the number of women who have been seriously attracted to me over the course of the past four years have numbered in the East-Indian realm of zero. Why? Because I'm nice. The solution? Nothing, because I don't have the self-confidence to be cocky and God knows I'm not funny. Inabilities notwithstanding, C & F guys are dicks.

My finances are as mewling infants strapped to an armed nuclear warhead.

I have no talent, no inspiration, and no future.

Jimmy - Tool

Instead of a real post detailing the firestorms and hurricanes of my life (whoa-oh-oh!), I shall give you a bunch of useless quizzes stolen from a highschooler's LiveJournal.

If I were a hygiene product, I'd be

Click here to find out which hygiene product you'd be at BRAINPUKE.COM!

You scored as Comic/Videogame Geek. Hosannah! You are a video game and/or comic book geek! This means that you now possess bedsores and carpal tunnel syndrome from the countless hours spent in the persona of a hedgehog, elfin creature, or Las Vegas thug! Was it worth it? Also, if you answered yes to playing Dance, Dance Revolution, you might secretly be gay. Back to your joystick! Comic/Videogame Geek 100% Computer Geek 83% Sci-Fi Geek 83% Dungeons & Dragons Geek 83% Anime Geek 83% Nerd 83% Loser 67% Not A Geek 33% Redneck Dork 0% What Breed of Geek are You? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Romantic Kisser. Good for you! You know how to kiss and hopefully you have a certain someone to experience a serge of happiness with. If not, it doesnt hurt to flirt kiss a little hehe. Just dont get carried away. Romantic kissing is always a plus! Kissing is an art keep it up and youll be really good! Romantic Kisser 100% Yippy Ki Yay! 56% Dont quit your day job... 25% How good do you kiss? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Cartilage Piercing. You could probably be described as a little edgy but basically nice. Good for you for being a complete poser. You're probably a little art kid too. Woo freakity hoo. Cartilage Piercing 90% Labret Piercing 80% Dirty Piercings 70% Nose Piercing 70% Tongue Piercing 70% Earlobe Piercing 60% Nipples 50% Lip Piercing 40% Belly Button Piercing 20% What Piercing Are You? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Loner. You loner you. Continue on your trek for loneliness and hatred for the world! Loner 75% Art Freak 69% Loser 19% Nerd 6% Cheerleader/Jock 0% Punk Ass Kid 0% What's You're Sterotype? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as alternative. You're partially respected for being an individual in a conformist world yet others take you as a radical. You have no place in society because you choose not to belong there - you're the luckiest of them all, even if your parents are completely ashamed of you. Just don't take drugs ok? alternative 83% Middle Class 54% Upper middle Class 50% Lower Class 42% Luxurious Upper Class 13% What Social Status are you? created with QuizFarm.com

There. Now you all go and score the same because we're just clones of each other.

No Surprises - Radiohead

For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin?

Now cracks a noble heart. Good-night, sweet prince,
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!

Cool Blue Reason - Cake

I hate Mondays.

Class from 10:00 to 3:00, work from 4:00 to 7:00, and percussion practice from 8:00 to 10:00. And this particular Monday, I'm running on about four hours of sleep. If I get sick again, I'm going to adopt the age-old practice of bleeding for the cure.

I want to sleep, not explicate Shakespeare's sonnets.

One more week until spring break. Then let anarchy rule my schedule for twelve blissful days ere the return of responsibility.

Magic - Nick Drake

"Hey, dude, what's that on your shirt?"
"Huh?"
"That big purple stain."
"Oh, I spilled some irony on myself earlier."
"Again?"
"Hey, not my fault I work at the irony factory."
"Yeah, but can't you be more careful?"
"Dude, I work in the fucking vat. I live my days chin-deep in the shit."
"Oh."